19 July 2009

Battlefield Earth


Possibly the greatest example of the medium of film ever commited to celluloid.
A joy to behold from start to finish. If Jesus Christ himself were to turn water into a film then this would be the end result. I'd compare it to injecting a film version of heroin directly into your mind.
You want to see John Travolta look like a cross bettween Worf from star trek, the Predator and Gene Simmonds? You've got it right here buddy. Mentally challenged humans learning to fly Harrier Jump jets in a matter of minutes? You're in luck today then champ, it's got that too. In bucketloads.
If i were to marry a film then i'm fairly sure it would be this one. Although i may end up cheating on it with Uncle Buck.
I would award this film 24 years with no chance of Parole.
I thought about touching myself 3 times during this film, but did not as there were ladies present.

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